Lost

We had once walked in leisurely steps/marching to an unknown regal beat/hands attached, embroidered together/eyes never wavering from dreamy glances
However, unbeknownst to me,/you had seen something ahead more valuable,/eyes avert in scorning guilt,/you hastened, jerked away
I attempted to anchor myself into the sand,/vehement in my attempt to pull you back/and yet your determination was strict I fell to the ground in tears,/tasting sour on my tongue/I had licked my wounds clean, reveling in the electric pain/watched them heal with blackened eyes
Unsteady, like a foal on wobbly legs, I stood/unwillingly my body hesitantly advanced/searching blindly for a familiar shadow,/that feel over the horizon - a burning starI had gained momentum, jog, run, strive, trip, fall/my legs were damaged - my eyes were frenzied/my heart had given up faith
And in this calamity he appeared - a swift wind/he lifted me, carried me,/arms tender warm - eyes dark, sinful with betrayal,/a traitor, a pretence
My skin was thickened from my scabs/my mind rejected pain/A numb martyr in his arms,/eyes closed from realities lost doors
My weight was unbearable,/and so I crashed unwillingly from a haven /I tumbled through colors, tastes, smells and stoodI walked farther than I had imaged possible/eyes chastised on the eternal road/you meant little then/and yet my mind had wandered - masochistic in origin
Thoughts danced wickedly /almost consuming my morals and filled me with hope/I scolded my eyes, scolded my heart - forward march!/and shivered in the approaching cold - bare skinned Now your figure darkens my horizon/your mind ignorant to my struggles/the path I had marked with endless footsteps
You’re haggard and broken- confused and lost/I walk in step behind you, a silent plague/too far to touch/too close to speak
I watch, blood boiling/trying to override the evident joy and pain in this reunion/while my hand flexes, wanting so much to grab yours,/take this world by storm together
Yet you shall reject me,/push me away and abuse me/it’s obvious on the tasteless windYou walk on/unbeknownst to my presence, my struggle/you never were clairvoyant - never were perceptive/and in this laid your fears
In your shadow I hide,/living in this world of endless night and frozen rain/stabbing into my palms/filling me with pain that spread with wildfire like eagerness
I am not your messiah,/your sacrifice, /your regret
Impossible to escape/you never change pace/shivering violently, angrily/I hasten, walk, run, fly ahead of you
Not once do I turn for your expression/eyes trained forward - FORWARD MARCH!/with heartbroken relief,/I overcome your grasp of time